· Listen carefully to what he says about his previous girlfriends. If he tells you that they all behaved badly towards him, then that’s probably exactly what he’ll say about you, one day. If they’ve all disappointed him, you can bet you’ll end up disappoi

Most people can’t sit down at a piano for the first time and play a Mozart sonata; although you might find the odd one or two who can play whatever they hear by ear.

Most people won’t put their trust in someone who they know is emotionally damaged, had a ‘hard life’, and a history of troubled relationships, and achieve their happy ever after. But one or two do.

One thing you’ve learned from your experience is that you’re uncritical to a fault. You’re so prepared to believe the very best of your partner (and probably the worst of yourself) that you’re blind to the warning signs.

Some people can run faster than others. Some are better at sport, or art than others. Some can sing; others can’t. Some are good at maths; others aren’t. It’s not a question of better or worse. It’s a simple fact.

Some women are better at relationships than others. Picking good potential partners is not one of your natural gifts. But it is something you can learn.

So how do you do it?

· Take new relationships SLOWLY. This serves two purposes: first, it gives you the time to notice things; second, abusive men tend not to want to spend too long courting their prey and they will either start to lose interest or show their true colours.

· Make a written record of every little ‘incident’ where a new partner behaves in a way that you don’t quite like, or you find upsetting. You may start to a see a pattern. He may sulk if he doesn’t get his own way, or ignore your feelings, or get angry over small things.

· Listen carefully to what he says about his previous girlfriends. If he tells you that they all behaved badly towards him, then that’s probably exactly what he’ll say about you, one day. If they’ve all disappointed him, you can bet you’ll end up disappoin

One thing you’ve learned from your experience is that you’re uncritical to a fault. You’re so prepared to believe the very best of your partner (and probably the worst of yourself) that you’re blind to the warning signs.

Some people can run faster than others. Some are better at sport, or art than others. Some can sing; others can’t. Some are good at maths; others aren’t. It’s not a question of better or worse. It’s a simple fact.

Some women are better at relationships than others. Picking good potential partners is not one of your natural gifts. But it is something you can learn.

So how do you do it?

· Take new relationships SLOWLY. This serves two purposes: first, it gives you the time to notice things; second, abusive men tend not to want to spend too long courting their prey and they will either start to lose interest or show their true colours.

· Make a written record of every little ‘incident’ where a new partner behaves in a way that you don’t quite like, or you find upsetting. You may start to a see a pattern. He may sulk if he doesn’t get his own way, or ignore your feelings, or get angry over small things.

· Listen carefully to what he says about his previous girlfriends. If he tells you that they all behaved badly towards him, then that’s probably exactly what he’ll say about you, one day. If they’ve all disappointed him, you can bet you’ll end up disappoi

Some women are better at relationships than others. Picking good potential partners is not one of your natural gifts. But it is something you can learn.

So how do you do it?

· Take new relationships SLOWLY. This serves two purposes: first, it gives you the time to notice things; second, abusive men tend not to want to spend too long courting their prey and they will either start to lose interest or show their true colours.

· Make a written record of every little ‘incident’ where a new partner behaves in a way that you don’t quite like, or you find upsetting. You may start to a see a pattern. He may sulk if he doesn’t get his own way, or ignore your feelings, or get angry over small things.

· Listen carefully to what he says about his previous girlfriends. If he tells you that they all behaved badly towards him, then that’s probably exactly what he’ll say about you, one day. If they’ve all disappointed him, you can bet you’ll end up disappoi

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